In Memory of My Mother

moving in any direction now seems impossible to do--I hate how the feeling of losing you is too new

today you would have seen sixty-one
but His plan had already been laid
so I smile to hide the tears that will run
for you're one of the new Angels He's made

I will try to persuade my heart to be joyous
I may will myself to put on a guard
Sometimes bitter, but some times sweet
you told me that my journey too often would be hard

I've never been the most patient
but I remember your smile when you thought of how far I'd come
of all the blessings I received in my life

by far, you were the greatest one.

I'll always love you, and I'll miss you Forever.

Queen Poetess B Copyright © 2009 All Rights Reserved

Counting Time

...yet another day goes by...

Each day of the past two weeks
I count to the hour just before
I tell myself that two weeks ago, this day
She would live one hour more
It has been hard for me to deal with
But I guess when I grieve, this is my way
I wake up each day knowing
That I will not hear her voice, or see her face on this day
For only in the confines of my mind
Has its echo and vivid imagery never ceased to exist
So maybe each day that I count the time
Reminds me that it is for this long, without her
I still breathe-- I still live.

Queen Poetess B Copyright © 2009

With A Heavy Heart....

She has been released from prison; she has been relieved of her pain and her day to day struggle... but this has bought me little comfort in the past days knowing I must continue in her absence. I do though, because I can still hear her fussing at me to stop worrying about everything! :) I don't think her voice will ever leave me, so I pray it never does. I have so much to say, but am ill equipped at the moment. But I draw comfort from the love of friends and family-- their well wishes. It may seem simple enough, but I have begun to rebuild myself with the following thought from a friend I read only yesterday:

This chapter of your life may be met with bereavement and hard times, but in the midst of this storm, you will find a healing like no other. A healing that will make you the strong woman little girls aspire to be. My prayers are with you...

You will never know how much that has meant to me.